Life can be hard. Life can be confusing. But life can also be rewarding. Problems in our most important relationships often make life harder and more confusing but when going well, they make life more fulfilling. What you do in your relationships and how you do it makes all the difference.
For more than three decades, I have passionately pursued an integrated understanding of who God made us to be and what makes us tick based upon the incredibly insightful information presented in the first chapters of Genesis. This deep understanding allows me to help people understand themselves and their loved ones as-well-as to craft unique and creative interventions to help people in their most important relationships. Dovetailing with this theory, I have developed a unique theory and approach to dealing with the epidemic of compulsive and addictive behaviors (CAB’s for short) plaguing our lives, marriages, homes and churches. Although the chemical addictions grab the most attention, people are addicted to hundreds of different non-chemical forms which can be every bit as destructive and are often easier to hide than chemical substances (return to the home page to read the article and take my test).
As a Christian, I am committed to being the most effective agent of change–one of the many tools in God’s hands–in my client's lives as possible. This commitment dictates I understand and utilize the most effective and professional tools and therapies currently available. I also encourage all of my clients–no matter where they currently are–to move forward in their faith journey. Unfortunately, most of us know a lot more about what we’re supposed to do than we actually do. Much of my work and emphasis involves helping my clients move the knowledge of who we’re supposed to be and what we should do into real life application.
Most of us communicate well in daily interactions but when there’s conflict, we freeze up, become aggressive or run away. I’ve developed several effective communication strategies to help my clients deal with the conflict that inevitably pops up when people relate to one another. I’ve had the pleasure and joy of helping countless people over the years to be agents of healing in their marriages and families.
My education includes a Master's Degree in Counseling from Denver Seminary and a Doctoral Degree in Counseling Psychology from Northern Arizona University. For more than three decades I have been a Licensed Psychologist and Certified Diagnostician in New Mexico.
I love to work with marriages and families, CAB’s (primarily non-chemical forms), depression, anxiety, building healthy relational skills, healing rifts in relationships, trauma (both childhood and adult with Level II training in EMDR), anger, men's issues and parenting. I work directly with individuals from early adulthood to adults well into their 80's. For younger children, I provide consultation to parents on creative ways to change their child’s behavior and to deal with out of control emotions.
I have written a workbook called Changing Destructive Patterns in Your Relationships and am working on one tentatively titled The Thirty Year Plan: Raising Your Husband, Finishing the Job Your Mother-In-Law Should Have Started. In this book I help women–and some motivated men–figure out how to help their spouse grow emotionally and relationally. I have CD’s for sale to parents for using contracts to deal with their adolescent children. In another area of family conflict, chores, I have a Family Chores Value List that can help parents move their children and adolescents forward in being responsible around the home. I have also written several extended handouts or pamphlets on rubber-meets-the-road types of issues including communication when there are problems, true forgiveness, control, etc.
When not in the office, I spend time with my family–I have been blessed with two beautiful children now grown, educated, and starting their own families. Playing racquetball and going to the gym help me stay healthy and relieve stress. As a hobby, I do remodeling, cabinetry, or a furniture project to improve the house and keep my skills somewhat tuned.
I am available for in-office appointments, telephone consults, training and conference presentations for individuals, churches, businesses and organizations.